Broken

100+ boxes later and I’m unpacked.

My anchor is dropped. Over six years of being homeless, traveling the world, I’ve stopped. I’m ambivalent about being happy. I’m going to miss traveling. I’m going to miss seeing something new on a regular basis. I’m going to miss the freedom.

I’m NOT going to miss the loneliness.

I’m not going to miss watching the slow train wreck that is happening to the world right now.

 I sincerely hope that I eventually stumble into a life I love in my new home.

MY new home. I do love so many things about it. First and foremost, it’s all mine. If I want to paint a wall, I paint the wall; no consultations, no bargaining.

But I have to paint the wall.

Anyhoo… back to the 100 boxes of stuff. When I set off on the journey back in 2009, we sold everything and put precious and practical items in boxes in storage.

I actually forgot about a lot of that stuff. Opening most boxes was like Christmas morning. Of course, many precious items from grandparents, drawings and gifts from the children, touchstone, and photos – all brought tears to my eyes.

 Lifetimes of memories.

But a lot of it was stuff collected over the years. Useful, but still stuff.

I was lucky that my neighbour was an Army vet and was a whiz at packing. She insisted in helping me pack up my home and boy, was I lucky to have her.

Out of all the china, crystal, glass, et cetera, none of that was broken. Only two things were broken, and you won’t believe what they were.

As I have indicated before, when I started on my journey, I was married. I ended my journey single.

I was always proud of my family, and my family was the most important thing in my life, without exception. We had many decorative items scattered about the home that indicated the four of us. (Beyond photos.)

One of the items I had was a set of Sid Dickens ceramic blocks of King, Queen, Prince, and Princess crowns to represent us four. They were proudly placed in the living bookshelf.

They look like this:

The ONLY two items damaged through four moves was the King and Queen block. I kid you not.

It was so indicative of my experience, I sobbed for a day. The King and Queen of my family were broken and damaged. Cracked and scarred forever more. Never to be the same. The King and Queen had fallen.

I’ve passed the Prince and Princess blocks to my children, but knowing what they represented and how our family, like the blocks, is now scattered, I’m not too sure they were happy to have them.

He has his broken King block.

I glued my Queen block back together and hung it in my bedroom. I’m not broken, but you can see the cracks.

4 thoughts on “Broken

  1. Cherie Kelley says:

    Oh, Shanta. How things happen are beyond us. And hopefully I did not break the king and queen by wrapping them too tight. It is exciting though the story you told. You are right you are not broken but we all have cracks and bruises. I have plates that are over a hundred years old that belonged to my grandparents. My grandpa loved the plates as they were the first plates he and grandma had when married early 1900’s. Anyway when grandma came over to Canada in 1913 with two little children in tow to meet grandpa and start a new life in Canada she brought a few personal things the plates being one thing. Needless to say they were broken. Grandpa repaired them with staples into the bone china on the back of the plate and egg whites!
    I have them in my china cabinet and they are as beautiful as the day when they first purchased. So your queen is as beautiful as you. And I am so happy for you.
    How is Estée? Does she like her new home?
    Take care. Be happy. Remember you are beautiful inside and out. 🍷🐾🏡💐❤️❤️🐾🐾🇨🇦

    Like

    • Thank you, Cherie. No worries, everything was packed perfectly. They were the only two of all my Sid Dickens that were broken. How weird is that?

      The touchstones are so personal and meaningful to only us, and how lucky you are to have such precious touchstones from your grandparents! And with such a fabulous story attached to them. How lucky for you to have them in your possession. ☺️

      Estée is slowly getting used to her new home but I think it will be some time before she doesn’t believe we aren’t leaving for a while.

      Hope to see you soon! 💛😘

      Like

  2. Mimi says:

    How freaky is that? Symbolism is everywhere. I remember when I got engaged, my stone fell out of mom’s family ring. Can’t wait to see your new place. YOURS!

    Like

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