Is This Really Necessary?

Is this really necessary?

Is this really necessary?

This year, the New Year Eve festivities in Paris will be a laser show from and on the Arc de Triomphe.

One Parisan lady, obviously not impressed, expressed her dismay by simply stating, “Is that really necessary?”

My daughter and I both laughed and it has become our touchstone quote throughout our whole Christmas trip to Paris. And it got me wondering, what a fabulous way to live, always asking if something is really necessary.

Think about it – how streamlined and efficient your whole life would be and become, only by using four simple words.

Buying something new? Is it really necessary?

Spending money on frivolity? It is really necessary?

Have someone in your life that is more effort than they are worth? Are they really necessary?

Name brands? Are they really necessary?

The amount of food/snacks you are about to eat? Is that really necessary?

A full cart at Costco? Is that really necessary?

That bottle of supplements? That new exercise fad? That diet book? Are they really necessary?

Adding to your debt? Is that really necessary?

Another glass of wine? Yes.

And so on.

By removing the unnecessary from your life, you allow the necessary more room to be useful, pleasurable, and balanced.

In debt? This question alone will help you magically return to sanity, help you to stop spending, using the extra money to pay down your balance and then to stay out of debt.

Overweight and out of shape? Is it necessary to eat so much, rely on the magic diet/gizmo, taking the escalator/elevator or vehicle everywhere? Even ask yourself if the gym membership is necessary.

Stressed to the max? Is it necessary to work so much, take on so much, get involved so much?

In a bad or one-sided relationship? Is it necessary to keep this person in your life?

House full of stuff and cluttered? Is it necessary to keep buying more? Is it even necessary to keep it all?

Who needs resolutions when you have one guiding question all year around?

Using the “Is this really necessary?” as the first and most important question for everything you do, you will find that when it comes to yearly New Year’s resolutions, they won’t ever be necessary.

You Can’t Always Get What You Want

Here comes Christmas. The third Christmas with my family blown apart.

It never gets easier; you just learn to cope with it healthier.

Iโ€™ll be alone on Christmas Day, but Iโ€™ll be in Paris, so Iโ€™m good.

I received an early Christmas gift this year. One I wasnโ€™t expecting nor asked for. I didnโ€™t even know I needed this gift.

Sidebar – Never surprise people; you donโ€™t know where they are at and the surprise could turn to distress. [And believe people when they say they donโ€™t like surprises.]

The boundaries of what I thought were my contentment were tested and shaken. Sobbing and reverting to old patterns, I failed miserably. Or did I?

After one night of a solid pity party, the next day I shook it off.

The day after the day after, it slowly it came to me that I shook it off quite easily and quickly. I got right back on that path of being appreciative and joyful but without a lot of thinking or effort. It felt like the most natural thing in the world; to carry on without feeling distressed.

What a fabulous gift to receive, a gift of testing your strength, without having to lose anything. Learning that you can, and will bend, but you wonโ€™t break.

Just knowing that my strength is still there, no matter what life throws at it, makes me feel even sturdier.ย And happier.

Thank you for the best Christmas present you ever gave me.